I was thinking about life today.
Thinking about this blog. Thinking about people. Thinking about Ruben.
Wondering what people think when they read this blog.
Wondering what people say when I come up in conversation.
Wondering what people think when they see a picture of me.
Wondering what people thought when I left Florida to move to Chicago.
Wondering what people here genuinely think of me.

No, I am not conceited.

I was merely pondering these questions as they ran through my mind..

I started to think about life more long term.

After School.
After more years of marriage.
After some kids.
After those big things in life people talk about.

What about after this life full of big things we're supposed to accomplish? I wonder, are people putting more weight on the not-so-big things, and neglecting the real big things?

I think so.

There is such pressure for success in this life that is measured by all the wrong things.

Material things.

What about
Gentleness, and

What will people say about me when I come up in conversation after I'm gone?
Will they remember me?
Will I have had done something worth remembering?
Will I have treated people the way I should have?
Will people know who I was living for?

Well, those are just some thoughts that came up today.
They reminded me of a song by Nichole Nordeman that I heard quite a while ago.

Nichole Nordeman - Legacy

I don't mind if you've got something nice to say about me
And I enjoy an accolade like the rest
You could take my picture and hang it in a gallery
Of all who's who and so-n-so's that used to be the best
At such'n'such ... it wouldn't matter much

I won't lie, it feels alright to see your name in lights
We all need an 'Atta boy' or 'Atta girl'
But in the end I'd like to hang my hat on more besides
The temporary trappings of this world

I want to leave a legacy
How will they remember me?
Did I choose to love? Did I point to You enough
To make a mark on things?
I want to leave an offering
A child of mercy and grace who
blessed your name unapologetically
And leave that kind of legacy

I don't have to look too far or too long awhile
To make a lengthly list of all that I enjoy
It's an accumulating trinket and a treasure pile
Where moth and rust, thieves and such will soon enough destroy

Not well traveled, not well read, not well-to-do or well bred
Just want to hear instead, "Well Done" good and faithful one.

Have you done something great lately?


Home Confusion

Stacy bought her ticket to come home today.
She will arrive July 7, 2010 at 6:30am.


There's that word again.


What does that mean?

It's interesting because when I talk to people about my ideas of what home is,
there is not much of a difference in opinion.

Apparently, many more people have gone through this 'home confusion' than I expected.

To list a few:
Stacy - when she came 'home' from FSU
Rachel - when she came 'home' from UIC
Jessica - when she came 'home' from SEU
Tusa Wendy - when she went 'home' to Canada after moving to Florida
My mom - when she went back to 'home' to Romania after being in Canada
Ema - when she went back 'home' from Moldova
Lilly - when she came back 'home' from Texas after a whole summer
Becky - when she came back 'home' from TIU

Stacy again - when she comes 'home' from the world race.

It's rough.

I finally know how it feels. It is really an awful feeling.


What's even more frustrating, is when you talk to 'friends' who don't seem to understand. Not even a little. Friends who don't even try to put themselves in your shoes. Not even a little.

When Stacy told me she bought her ticket,
I felt every feeling in my stomach that is possible I think.

I felt as if it was me buying my ticket to go 'home'.

I think it is so important to be there for each other.

God tells us to love Him and love people.

I think this is very much part of what that means.
Be there for those in need.
Even if it isn't a homeless man, or a starving child in Ethiopia.
While they need our help too, people much closer to us than we think need us just as much.

Everyone needs love. You can't be over loved. I think that's awesome.

I love love.

I think part of loving people means being there for them when they need it.
Just like God is there for us when we need it, even in times when we think we can handle life on our own.

I hope to be there for Stacy when she comes 'home'.
I know it's going to be tough. Really tough.
I am positive many tears will be shed.

I am also positive that after some time, things will settle down and feel a little more like 'home'. Whether it is in Florida, or somewhere else. The feeling of belonging somewhere will come again.

I love you, Stacy.

See you soon.


North Carolina.

This is what North Carolina looked like from my eyes.
May 21-24th, 2010.

To Do

Grocery shopping
Cleaning the car inside and out

Those are a few of the things on the To Do list for today.

I am in the process of making the grocery list.
I just looked at the pile of clothes that needs to be washed and cringed.
Car washing shouldn't be too bad.

It would be cool if I had someone to do all of these things with.
Ruben went to work and he has school tonight.

It is super hot out.
Well, 84 degrees.
After being in the 60's and under for so many months, I forgot how this feels.
Thankfully, I finally got all my hot weather clothing from Florida up here.

I miss my family today.Bad.
I want to be with people.
Being alone is no fun.

I need to make more friends. ASAP.
This is unacceptable.

While visiting Florida, I hung out with people from the second I woke up until the moment I went home to go to bed. Here, I wake up to have breakfast with Ruben. That's it. After breakfast, he leaves for work and I'm left to keep myself busy with things I have yet to find that I enjoy.

I guess I should take into consideration that this is the first day back from vacation.

I need to get back into the groove of things.

Hopefully, I'll get everything done today.

I'll upload pictures tonight.

Maybe I'll make something delicious for dinner.

I am open to any and all recipes.



Today we woke up to an oil filled breakfast.
Every item consumed this morning was deep fried in vegetable oil.
Did that stop anyone from eating? Certainly not.

Directly following this artery clogging breakfast,
we decided to begin our journey to Grandfather Mountain.

My mom, dad, Ruben, and myself decided to hike up to the top.
Pete drove up because his gout was acting up.

We eventually made it to the top. It was beautiful. Totally worth the hike.
I must admit, I was a little scared that I would fall off the mountain at any moment. By the end of our adventure, we were all sunburned.

After Grandfather Mountain, we went trout fishing.
We were determined to have Ruben catch his first fish.
Not only did he catch his first fish, but it was 6 lbs.
We ate half of it for dinner. Yes, only half for 5 people.
That's how big it was.

We then went back to the apartment to relax a little before dinner.
Ruben, Pete, and I sat on the balcony while indulging in some strawberries and cool whip. Delicious.

We ate dinner and then decided to go rent a movie.
We did not end up renting a movie.
We did, however, make a pit stop at McDonald's after stopping by this super cute coffee shop only to find that it was closed. Closed at 6:42pm when the sign on the door clearly stated Open 7am-7pm. No where on the door did it mention that on Sunday's they would be closed at 6:42pm.

While waiting at the drive-thru window for our Mocha frappe's, we had quite an experience. Before the man handed us our drinks he asked us what we ordered in an accent that was almost impossible to understand. Ruben politely responded and the man continued to ask questions after which he immediately said "what if I really had that accent" in perfect English. It was hilarious. We could not stop laughing.

When he saw how much we enjoyed his joke, he offered us a free drink and continued to speak to his fellow employees with this accent. It was definitely the best McDonald's experience I have ever had.

After our not so disappointing drive down the mountain, we headed back up to watch the Lost Finale. I have seen a total of 2 episodes in my lifetime. I do not understand how it got to be so big. Nonetheless, I am glad it's over.

Tomorrow we are driving back to Chicago.
We were planning to pit stop for lunch with Josh and Persida, but I don't think it's going to end up working out. I was looking forward to seeing them. Maybe next time.

I am going to post pictures in the next post.

I wish you all a fabulous Monday.

I'll see you there, or I'll see you on another time.


PAC-MAN's 30th Birthday

After what seemed like a never ending drive,
we arrived at Sugar Top at 9:45 last night.

For some unknown reason, my bladder decided that it wanted to be so overactive yesterday that we had to stop literally every hour, pretty much on the hour.

It could have been the giant can of green tea I had for breakfast.
If so, I will never drink green tea near, in, or around a car again.

We packed sandwiches and some snacks.
As Debbie would say "we were responsible adults".

We had Chinese for dinner. We weren't impressed.
The place by our house is far more superior in taste and presentation.

I'm not sure what the day holds. It's a little chilly.

We're going to go down the mountain to get some groceries and go eat breakfast/lunch.
I am foreseeing one of the laziest days we've had in a while. It's super gloomy out.
Is that good thing? I haven't decided yet.

Ruben has some school work to keep himself occupied.
I would have crocheting, if I didn't leave it in Florida.
However, I think my mom is bringing it.

I talked to her this morning.
She said they (her, my dad, and Pete) should be arriving around or a little before 6pm.
I promised I would have all the necessary ingredients for delicious burritos ready and waiting for them to thoroughly enjoy upon arrival.

I can't let them down.
Who am I kidding? I love Mexican food.
I would mostly be letting myself down if I didn't follow through.
I might take some pictures.

Let me know if pictures are something I should continue to add in future posts.

Happy 30th Birthday, PAC- MAN.


New Adventures

Stanley's Kitchen and Tap
Random community that would be perfect for a photo shoot.
Alfred Caldwell Lilly Pond

Above I have listed the places I visited today with Rachel.

Interestingly enough, all of these places are very close to my house.

Did I know they all existed minutes from my doorstep? No way.
Am I unbelievably happy that Rachel introduced me to them? You bet.

Stanley's makes one mean burger.
The lilly pool was breathtaking.
Starbucks quenched my thirst.
Ulta supplied me with body wash and nail polish.
Aldi provided us with some eggs, bread, sandwich meat, and tea.

I noticed this sign behind one of the seating areas at the lilly pond.

I totally see why Laurence loved his spot.
This is where he sat.

This is what he saw.

Cool huh? Well, I think so.

I thought of my cousin Jessica the whole time.
I wished I would have known of this place when she was visiting.
She would have loved it.

I took some other photos also.
I don't have much to say today.
I figured I would just share some other shots I took.
I am not professional, so please don't judge my photography skills.

Here goes..

That's about it..

Tomorrow Ruben and I are driving to North Carolina to meet up with my parents.
Should be interesting..

Until the next adventure,
Be cool, stay in school.


Come Stand By Me

May 19, 2010.

Jonny's 23rd birthday.
The day I left my first visit to Florida since I moved.
The day I saw my husband after not seeing him for 6 days.
The day I hung out with my brother, mom, and Gil for lunch.
The day I talked to Deda about Theology.
The day I met perhaps the best person to sit next to in a plane.
The day I decided that I thoroughly enjoy Mediterranean cuisine.
The day a flight attendant would not allow me to use the restroom.
The day I heard a man and wife talking while waiting to board the plane.

The man looked as if he was once a surfer.
Both the woman and man seemed laid back.
You could tell they really enjoyed being with one another.

Husband: "Come stand by me"
Wife: "It's ok, I'm right here"
Husband: "I don't want you to get left behind"
Wife(to surrounding people): He would never leave me behind"

Note: I feel a pattern coming on with this "God using life to show Himself more clearly" thing. I think I will call it "Life lessons with God". In the future when I refer to these moments, that is how I will do it.

I felt that trust and love were displayed so well in this small dialog.
The man genuinely expressed concern for the fear of his wife being left behind, while the woman was secure in the fact that he loved her so much that he would ensure she would always be taken care of.

Maybe it was just me, but I think that was an awesome interaction to have witnessed.The trust she had in this man was so sincere.
She knew, without a doubt, that this man would never leave her behind.


I think that is how our faith in God should be.


There should be no doubt in our minds that He would ever leave us beind.
We should be in no doubt of the fact that He cares that much about us.

I really enjoy observing people. Like I said before, I love them.

As I went through a mental overview of my week in Florida, many instances came to mind. I ended up spending some time with the boys the night before I left. In the end, Nicky was the only one of the brothers who was actually surprised to see me.
He was cute.

I have to say, I always felt that there was something very special about Nicky, but in this specific occasion I saw it more prevalent than ever before.
I was impressed.
I was proud.
I was excited to see what is to come.

To recap my trip:
I LOVE my family.
I did not see everyone I planned to see.
I felt out of place in the place I once called home.
I fell in love with my 2 new family members.
I was there for Jonny's 23rd birthday.
I slept in every day.
I remembered how to get everywhere.
I spent awesome time with Anda, Steve, and Abi.
I got to see Lilly briefly.
I had good talks with Jess, as always.
I watched Nico attempt to crawl.
I held Madison for an extended period of time and loved every second.

Overall, I would say it was a fantastic trip.
Although I know people will be upset and will not be shy to make sure I know it, I still had a fantastic trip.

Thank you, come again.


Family Wins

A new day has arrived.

I woke up this morning wondering what the day would hold.
Will today be a tough one?
Who will I see?
Will I feel new things?
What will I experience?
Will I remember how to get there?
Can I wait until tomorrow to put gas in the car?

I'm sure there were plenty more to add to the list, but I'll stick with those for now.

Initially, I expected today to be "hang out with mom" day.
Unfortunately, she was not home by the time I woke up, which for me was early(11am).

I called her asking how she expected us to hang out if she left so soon. She explained that she had waited for hours for me to wake up. Hours? Really? When on earth did she wake up?? Not only when, but why so early?
I guess it's a mom thing.

We talked for a little before she told me to just hang out with my friends and if I end up having nothing to do to call her cause she will drop everything to hang out with me.

She really thinks I'm a big deal.
Drop everything just to hang out with ME?

Needless to say, I felt very special this morning.

While I did not end up hanging out with her, I did hang out with Anda and Abi.
At first Abi forgot who I was, but then she warmed up to me and it was awesome.

Around 5pm, Steve came home.
I really like Steve.
I really like Anda.
I really like Abi.
I really like that little family.
I already know that I will really like baby #2.

Who am I kidding?.. I love that little family.

I got to talk to them a lot tonight. It was nice.

Most of my life I was the little cousin to Steve and Pete. I always felt that they were older, and we would never be able to really 'talk'(and if you know me, you know how much I love to talk). I don't think I can express in words how happy I am that things change when you get older. I can hang out with Pete now and I don't feel like the little cousin. I feel like we are two really awesome people, who happen to be cousins, hanging out.

I had such a good time talking and just being around Steve and Anda tonight.
It's refreshing to be able to talk to people so openly, especially when you never got a chance to before.
I love discovering similarities between us.
It's definitely the best.

I was really hoping to hang out with quite a few people today.
I expected that I would be 'friend hopping' all night.
As it turns out, I spent the entire day at their house, and to be honest, I would not have had it any other way. It was really that fantastic. Really.

I have to admit, I'm feeling pretty overwhelmed about tomorrow.

My last full day here.

I feel like I still have to see so many people, and realistically that's just not going to happen.

I can already hear the disappointed guilt trips from people when they find out I came to visit, and had the audacity to not hang out with them, much less tell them I was here.

It's rough.
Especially because I am such a people pleaser.

I have to constantly remind myself of the priorities I set for this trip.
"I came here to spend time with my family."
"I came here to spend time with my family."
"I came here to spend time with my family."

So far, I have done just that, and it has been really great.
I am hoping people understand, although I have a strong feeling that they won't.

Tomorrow morning we're meeting for breakfast with the family.
After that, I'm not really sure what will take place.
I still need to see Carol, the Vicovans, the Ciurdars, Lilly, and BILLY!

No, you are not seeing things. You read that correctly.
Evie. You mean to tell me that you have been in Florida since Friday, and you STILL have not see your own brother??

Yep. That is correct. I am a horrible sister.
However, I do intend on seeing him tomorrow, even if he is the only one I see.

If you have read this entire post, and feel unsure as to what the point of it all was, do not be alarmed. I assure you nothing is wrong.

To clear things up a bit, the moral of my rambling is:

Family wins.

And that's how the cookie crumbles.



I feel _____________.

I feel happy.
I feel confused.
I feel out of place.
I feel alone.
I feel curious.
I feel anxious.
I feel scared.
I feel worried.
I feel relieved.
I feel accomplished.
I feel excited.


To be able to feel so many emotions at once is intriguing.

I feel intrigued.

Well, it's day 2 (technically 3) of my visit to Florida.
I have no idea how I feel.
I have seen almost all my family, and some friends.

Out of nowhere today, I felt the weirdest thing.
I had just hung out with my cousins, and had briefly seen Lilly.
Everything was fine. Normal as can be. Just like old times.

I was in the car alone and I felt it.
Then I thought it.
Then I called Ruben to talk about it.

Ruben: "Hello?"
Evie: "I don't belong here anymore.."

It was possibly the scariest thing to be thinking while in the place you once considered to be the only place you would ever belong.

I didn't know if I should tell anyone, but when I got to my cousins house my aunt asked me how my trip has been. I couldn't hold back. I told her how I felt. She reassured me and told me she knew exactly what I was feeling because she went through the same thing when she got married. I felt relieved.

Although my life here stopped in December, no one else's did.
I am trying to pick up where I left off, and where I left off is long gone..

How does that make me feel?
Well, I'm not sure..
I feel so many things right now.

I want to feel sad, but realistically what did I expect?
Sure, part of me expected everyone to still have that place in their life for me..
Sure, part of me expected that I would be replaced..
But, none of me expected to feel that I do not belong in my "home".

We'll see what tomorrow brings.
Seeing more friends could be helpful.
Spending quality time with my adorable mother won't hurt either.

To be honest though, I'm really missing my husband right about now..

Until next time,
Stay classy, and thanks for stopping by.


Instant Love

I am in love with Nico Talpesh and Madison Rantin.

I have never experienced this kind of love before.

Sure, I love people.

I love:
My God,
My Husband,
My Family, and
My Friends.

Really. I genuinely love those groups of people, but this was a different love.

An Instant Love.

I couldn't help but kiss them all over and smile like a crazy woman.

I wanted to be no where else but in a seat where I could see both of them at the same time and just marvel in their creation.

Their innocence. Their helplessness. Their dependence. Their uniqueness.

It's crazy to think that we were all there once.
Totally and completely dependent on someone with our lives.
All of our trust was put in someone else to make sure we were cared for.

That's intense stuff.

Now, here we are. Grown up. Adults. Caring for ourselves.
Depending on ourselves to make sure things get done.

I wonder, is that how life is meant to be?
To be born totally dependent and to grow up into the opposite extreme?
Is that really how we are created to be? Totally independent of others?

I feel like it isn't. Like, it can't be.

I feel like we need people more than we want to admit.

It could be a personal opinion, but think about it.

Which is more fun?
1.Being home ALONE
2.Being home with FRIENDS/FAMILY?

I would most definitely, without question choose number 2. Every time.

I love people.
I love being with people.
I love laughing with people.
I love making memories with people.
I love talking about memories with people.
I love crying with people.
I love praying with people.
I love putting my trust in people who I know care about me.
I love knowing that the people I surround myself with love and cherish me.
I love that I am completely dependent on God with my life and everything in it.

Wait. What? What was that last one?
I am completely dependent on God with my life and everything in it?

Well, that's weird.
It seems that I have gone back to being a small, helpless baby..
Is that right?

Completely dependent with my life?
Completely dependent that all will be provided?
Completely dependent in knowing that the best is store for me?

Wait a minute.. Is that what faith is?

Hmm. Interesting. Cool. Awesome. Stupendous. Fantastic. Exciting. Incredible. Security. Comfort. Constant. Everlasting. Patient.


Instant Love.

Today I think I experienced a little bit of God's love.

Every moment spent looking at those adorable babies was Instant Love.

I would have done anything for them. Just like Jesus did for us.

It's cool how God uses life to help us understand Him more.

Thanks God.
Thanks for letting me experience that today.
It was pretty incredible.
To think that what I felt was just a small glimpse of what You feel is pretty insane.

Thanks though, for showing me your Instant Love.

You are The Best.

The Time Has Come

As I said in my previous post, it has been 4 months since I got married.

4 months since:
I moved to Chicago.
I have driven my old car.
I have seen most of my family.
I have seen my Florida friends.

It has been 4 months since I have been back "home".

Well friends, the time has come.

After quite an obnoxious plane ride consisting of:
A man suffering from restless leg syndrome to my left
A cuddling lesbian couple to my right, I have made it.

I am "home".

I must admit, I anticipated a strange feeling upon arrival.

I anticipated having to quickly adapt back to life here,
even if just for a few days.

My house smells different.

It isn't the house I lived in before.
The refrigerator is full of things I am not used to anymore.
I didn't go grocery shopping for these things.

As many things were rushing through my mind, I realized something.
This is no longer my home.
I have made a new home.

A new home in Chicago, Illinois with my Husband. My awesome husband.

What a strange realization.

To be standing in the house you lived in for 24 yrs and realize that this will never be home again is almost frightening. Really. I was a little scared.

Regardless, after taking in a little more of the place I once called home,
I proceeded to get into my old car and drive to my cousin's house.

I've missed them.

They were surprised,
except for Debbie, who somehow had a feeling I would come.
Debbie has always had these feelings.
It was almost expected that she would know.

It was so great spending time with them.

I love them.

It's hard to comprehend that we aren't little kids anymore.
We are grown ups.
Grown ups who have gotten married, and are now having our own little kids.

After seeing them and their new babies,
I couldn't help but feel super overwhelmed.
Life is such a beautiful thing that is going by so quickly.

Too quickly.

I feel like I need more time to soak it in.
Maybe I just need to spend more time soaking and less time rushing through life.

I'm excited for tomorrow. A new day.

Tomorrow is Surprise the Family/ Jenn's 26th Birthday. I can't wait.
It's going to be a day full of
maybe some crying, and
most definitely FOOD. Delicious food.

Who knows what the day will bring.

That's my life in the not so big city of Davie, Florida.


My life in the Big City.

So, summer has arrived.
I've been here for 4 months.


I would definitely use that as the word to describe the transition.
Davie, Florida and Chicago, Illinois are very different.
I thought I was doing great the first month.
I didn't know what I was so nervous about.

Life was great.

I had:
+just gotten married
+started attending a new school
+moved to a fun new place
-left my entire family
-left all of my friends
-left the place I had lived for the past 24 yrs of my life.

Around month 2, it hit me..

I had no friends.
I didn't know my way around.

Living through my first winter went better than I expected.
Apparently, this was an extremely MILD winter. HA.
I can totally see why people gain weight during the winter.
Who wants to put on 12 layers of clothing just to walk across the street?

I don't even want to start on the topic of parallel parking.

Nonetheless, here I am in month 4.
I have been a married woman for 4 months.
My husband is really quite amazing.
I really have to give him the credit for me getting this far.

Some days I would cry incessantly for hours.
Some weeks it would be 4 out of 7 days, others it was 2.

No matter when it was, or how stupid my reason seemed to be,
He was there.

He's the best.

I am not just saying that because he's my husband.

Really, he's incredible.

I wanted to start this blog when I moved here.
I wanted to document my journey in this new life I started.

Although it is a little late, here it is:

My life in the Big City.