I feel _____________.
I feel happy.
I feel confused.
I feel out of place.
I feel alone.
I feel curious.
I feel anxious.
I feel scared.
I feel worried.
I feel relieved.
I feel accomplished.
I feel excited.
To be able to feel so many emotions at once is intriguing.
I feel intrigued.
Well, it's day 2 (technically 3) of my visit to Florida.
I have no idea how I feel.
I have seen almost all my family, and some friends.
Out of nowhere today, I felt the weirdest thing.
I had just hung out with my cousins, and had briefly seen Lilly.
Everything was fine. Normal as can be. Just like old times.
I was in the car alone and I felt it.
Then I thought it.
Then I called Ruben to talk about it.
Evie: "I don't belong here anymore.."
It was possibly the scariest thing to be thinking while in the place you once considered to be the only place you would ever belong.
I didn't know if I should tell anyone, but when I got to my cousins house my aunt asked me how my trip has been. I couldn't hold back. I told her how I felt. She reassured me and told me she knew exactly what I was feeling because she went through the same thing when she got married. I felt relieved.
Although my life here stopped in December, no one else's did.
I am trying to pick up where I left off, and where I left off is long gone..
How does that make me feel?
Well, I'm not sure..
I feel so many things right now.
I want to feel sad, but realistically what did I expect?
Sure, part of me expected everyone to still have that place in their life for me..
Sure, part of me expected that I would be replaced..
But, none of me expected to feel that I do not belong in my "home".
We'll see what tomorrow brings.
Seeing more friends could be helpful.
Spending quality time with my adorable mother won't hurt either.
To be honest though, I'm really missing my husband right about now..
Until next time,
Stay classy, and thanks for stopping by.